


Two Gems and a Baby

by crystalgems-forever (eddifying)



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Baby Steven, Garnet ain't having your shit, Gen, Pearl and Amethyst arguing, Steven Universe AU, What else is new, since the Extended Opening anyway
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-03
Updated: 2016-02-29
Packaged: 2018-05-18 02:20:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5894329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eddifying/pseuds/crystalgems-forever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when two of the Crystal Gems are left in charge of baby Steven for one night? One of the most challenging missions they’ve ever experienced, of course.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Promises

**Author's Note:**

> Note: Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t think that the baby years would be an absolute freaking nightmare for the Gems. Can’t do it, can you?
> 
> Also, this was originally written before the extended opening was released, so don't let that keep you up at night.

Original tumblr post can be found [here](http://crystalgems-forever.tumblr.com/post/120726395141/fic-two-gems-and-a-baby).

* * *

 

“Thanks so much for doing this favor for me, Pearl. I mean, seriously, I _really_ appreciate it. Would you believe the last time I had any real shut-eye was before this little guy was born? That’s a really long time!”

“Of course Greg, it’s no trouble at all!” Pearl replied airily, mentally ticking off a series of bullet points she’d projected onto a holographic list. “I always forget how much you _humans_ tend to rely on sleep.” She made sure to place a special emphasis on the word ‘humans’ before continuing. “Did you _know_ that humans will spend up to 25 years of their life asleep? That’s practically _one-third_ of the average person’s total lifespan! Imagine wasting such a disproportionately lengthy time regenerating your energy – day after day, I suppose it really adds up. It’s simply _fascinating,_ don’t you think?”

“Uh, sure…” Greg nodded hesitantly. He was no stranger to the fact that Gems were granted all the energy they needed from their stones, and thus had no real need to sleep or eat, but he was beginning to suspect that Pearl was having a bit of ill-natured fun at his expense, with the way that she was rattling off these supposed facts with a superior air.

Curious about the exchange in the doorway, a snarl of long, messy white hair peeked over the countertop.

“Okay, I think that’s everything,” Greg sighed loudly as he checked the diaper bag for the umpteenth time. “There should be plenty of formula, you just have to follow the directions. All his favorite toys are there – he really loves the bear with the monocle for some reason. I dunno, seems a little too rich for my blood. We’ve got bibs, some spare shirts, baby powder – oh, I also put a _ton_ of diapers in there. You can never have enough of those, trust me!”

Greg’s nervous chuckle died out under Pearl’s complete non-reaction to everything he was saying, and he scratched the back of his balding head sheepishly.

“That’s fine, Greg,” Pearl replied absently, still reviewing her checklist.

“Aw you know it, _Grego-ree!_ This little guy’s an absolute _monster!”_ Amethyst merrily leapt over the kitchen counter and landed effortlessly on all fours, easily shattering Pearl’s hologram in the process. “Isn’t that right, little man?” she cooed at the mop of black hair that was strapped tightly to his traveling car seat. The only response she received was a miniscule snore, so she ruffled his hair affectionately in return, causing Greg to chuckle again, visibly relaxing in the wake of her lighthearted antics.

“Yeah you’re a little poop machine aren’t ya, yes you are, who’s the little monster that’s destroying all those diapers – _wuagh!”_

“Amethyst!” Pearl jerked her upright with a firm tug on the back of her shirt. _“Don’t. Touch. The baby!”_ She accentuated each word with a disciplinary hiss. “You’ll _wake_ him!”

“Yeesh, _sor-ree,”_ Amethyst scowled and rolled her eyes before deciding that looting the fridge for what little food it contained would be a more worthwhile use of her time.

“Well then,” Pearl returned to the previous conversation as if nothing had happened. “You have nothing to worry about, Greg. The three of us have this completely under control – rather, I should say that two of us will,” her eyes darted aside to check on Amethyst, who was currently assembling a sandwich made of indiscernible ingredients she’d dug out of the fridge.  The latter gave no sign of acknowledgement, so Pearl promptly turned her gaze back to Greg and gave him her most encouraging smile.

“Uh, yeah,” Greg was looking decidedly uncomfortable over the duo’s previous exchanges, and shuffled his feet awkwardly. “If you guys need anything, just… just feel free to ask. I won’t be that far away…” he then dropped to his knees and smiled tenderly at his son.

“Of course! We’ll be _fine,_ don’t you worry about a thing!”

 _“Ughh…”_ Amethyst groaned dully in the background.

This time, Greg was the one who was hardly paying attention. He focused his gaze on his infant son, his eyes welling with a mixture of pride, joy, and sorrow. He and his little son Steven had never been separated since the day he’d been born. He reached out and placed a gentle finger upon the baby’s cheek. “Now you be good for the Gems, okay bud? I won’t be gone very long.” He leaned in a bit closer, cupped a hand over his mouth, and whispered, “Just between you ’n me, I think it’ll be good practice for them.”

“Yes, yes, he’s in good hands,” Pearl’s decidedly sharp tone jarred Greg back to reality, and he got to his feet with a start. After a couple of decades hanging around these gals, he knew when to take a hint. Besides, the soft floor of his careworn van was calling his name, and he couldn’t wait to sing the sweet songs of the wonders of dreamland. He inhaled deeply, briefly enjoying the sweet woodsy tang of the freshly constructed floorboards to compose himself.

“Alright now, you kids have fun,” Greg joked before turning to the screen door, pulling it open. “And seriously, thanks again.”

“You’re welcome!” Pearl called out as she watched him trudge down the steps and onto the beach, waving at him all the while. Once he’d disappeared down the horizon, she pivoted elegantly towards the car seat and clasped her hands together eagerly.

 _“Excellent~!_ That takes care of that,” she trilled merrily as she swept the carrier into the air, striding gracefully towards the couch and setting it down with aplomb.

“Uh, _you’re_ gonna watch the baby?” Amethyst scoffed as she chewed, spraying large specks of her sandwich onto the pristine countertop. “I thought you said you didn’t want anything to do with –”

“Ugh! Chew with your mouth closed, _please!”_ came the revolted cry. “Besides, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Pearl frowned, her stringent tone indicating that the other Gem ought to drop the subject if she knew what was good for her. “I’m allowed to change my mind.”

“Sure, whatever you say,” Amethyst carelessly swept an arm across the counter, knocking her mess onto the floor, and dropped the plate into the sink with careless abandon. “All done!”

“Amethyst! Clean that up this _instant!”_ Pearl instructed through gritted teeth as she pointed to the invisible specks on the floor. “Do you have _any_ idea how much cleansing and disinfecting I had to do in preparation for accommodating this infant?!”

“Uh, prolly not a lot, since the house just got finished yesterday,” she returned smugly, gesturing to the freshly erected wooden structure encapsulating the mouth of the cave’s entrance. “I still don’t get why we can’t just use the Temple.”

_“Because –”_

“Because the Temple’s too dangerous for humans, especially one this small,” a low British tone rumbled as the star-studded entrance to the inner sanctum slid shut behind her.

This effectively quashed Amethyst’s temper, so she quickly scooped up the remaining crumbs of her sandwich and tossed them into the trash without a word.

Garnet turned her attention to Pearl, who’d been watching her teammates’ interactions with a triumphant nod and a rather self-righteous air. “You’re watching the baby?” she parroted Amethyst’s earlier question evenly.

“Yes,” Pearl straightened her spine and delicately lowered herself onto the sofa. “Greg was in want of a full night’s rest, and I figured I’d…  do him a favor.” At this, Garnet quirked an eyebrow beneath her shades, unbeknownst to all but her.

“Yeah, apparently the lil worm’s been makin’ it hard for him to get some shut-eye, which is great for Pearl, since she never sleeps anyway!” Amethyst grinned as she strode over and flopped onto the opposite end of the L-shaped couch, causing the slender Gem to puff out her cheeks and clutch the car seat’s handle protectively. “They’re perfect for each other!”

“Be _careful,_ Amethyst! At this stage of their development, humans are extremely fragile!”

“Aww, they’re not _that_ fragile!” the purple Gem insisted earnestly.

“Well, perhaps you can take your rambunctious _attitude_ to your room for the evening; that way Garnet and I can watch the baby.”

Stung, Amethyst’s mouth fell open. An array of particularly unpleasant retorts crossed her mind, but she eventually thought better of it. This wasn’t the first time that one of Pearl’s peremptory barbs had gotten under her skin, but she could pinpoint the exact moments that these little indiscretions had started becoming more frequent; in a particularly difficult incident a little over six months ago. Instead, she clamped her jaw shut and replied with a snarl. _“Fine!_ You don’t need to tell me twice!”

Amethyst hopped off the couch in a huff, preparing to storm off, but was intercepted by Garnet’s suddenly outstretched arm. “I can’t stay,” she then turned and stepped onto the warp pad.

“What? Why?!” the duo chorused in dismay.

“There’s a dangerous Gem monster wreaking havoc in the fire swamp.” At this, Pearl rose from her seat with a jolt, and the pair moved to accompany her on the platform.

“You two, stay here,” Garnet ordered sternly, causing them both to flinch dutifully. “I can handle this alone, but that human’s going to need _both_ of you to look after him.”

“G-Garnet, you can’t be _serious,”_ Pearl stepped forward to plead her case. “I mean – Amethyst, well – it’s just – we both know she shouldn’t be around –”

“Hey!” the younger Gem snapped, and Pearl felt a familiar heat creeping up the back of her neck.

“W-What I _meant_ to say is,” her eyes flicked to the car seat and back to Garnet, quickly losing her resolve under the usual expressionless gaze, and thus resorted to wringing her hands nervously. “Well, I – well… we _can’t_ … can’t it just … _wait?”_ she finished lamely.

Beside her, Amethyst winced sympathetically.

There was a very pregnant pause, and Garnet adjusted her visor stiffly. “Both of you, stay here. Look after the baby. _Together._ Understood?” Pearl and Amethyst nodded silently, vigorously, very much resembling a pair of very chastised bobbleheads on a trucker’s dashboard.

“Good. I won’t be long.” With that, the warp pad lit up, and in a blinding flash, Garnet was gone.

Slowly, Pearl lowered herself back into her seat beside the sleeping infant. Amethyst wordlessly climbed back onto the couch as well, doing so with as much dignity as she could muster. They sat in silence for what felt like hours, occasionally drumming their fingers together or rubbing their forearms to soothe their frazzled nerves.

“Sorry,” Amethyst finally piped up, causing Pearl to flinch slightly. “I know you’re just… tryin’a look out for the little goober, or whatever.”

“Yes, well, taking care of a human baby is a _huge_ responsibility! I had to do _soooo_ much reading in preparation for tonight, you don’t even _understand_ what I…” Pearl caught herself from saying too much, easing into a more sympathetic tone. She met her fellow Gem’s gaze and gave her a small, hopeful smile. “I hope you can forgive me… I-I just… I just want everything to go smoothly, okay?”

Amethyst returned the smile with one of her own and let out an alleviated sigh. “Yeah, I guess I can do that.” She relaxed her body against the back of the couch, craning her neck up to examine the baby from afar. “I can’t believe he’s still sleepin’ after all that racket.”

A sniff of a laugh escaped Pearl’s lips, and she turned her attention to the infant as well. “I know. I was honestly prepared for him to become an inconsolable mess after Greg’s departure.”

“Well, we’re still here,” Amethyst ventured, shuffling a bit closer to get a better look at the baby. “And the world didn’t end.” She scooted a bit more; her approach was incredibly slow, methodical, as if she were a wild animal inspecting something new. Finally, she stopped a few inches short of Pearl’s lanky frame, still peering into the car seat with extraordinary interest.

“You’re right, Amethyst. I suppose I was worried for nothing,” Pearl concluded ruefully.

It was as though the youngling were waiting for those exact words to take his cue. It happened so fast that neither of them had been given a chance to prepare. Steven turned a deep shade of red, then promptly opened his mouth and unleashed an ear-splitting scream that could only be rivaled by a handful of corrupted Gems that the group had had the misfortune of taking on during previous missions.

Amethyst defensively raised her hands up over her ears, and Pearl cupped a hand over her mouth in distress. Neither of them knew what to do; they were almost in a state of complete paralysis. Amethyst squeezed her eyes shut, as if hoping this would somehow put an end to the disturbance. All of the knowledge Pearl had absorbed from her preparatory reading was lost to her, now that she was actually expected to execute it.

Perhaps she’d spoke too soon after all.

_To Be Continued…_


	2. Fission Mailed

Original tumblr post can be found [here](http://crystalgems-forever.tumblr.com/post/123491125358/fic-two-gems-and-a-baby).

* * *

 

“Gee, thanks _soooo_ much for doing this for Greg, Pearl. I _really_ appreciate it!” Amethyst’s words were positively dripping with mockery as she rolled her eyes as far back into their sockets as they could possibly go.

“Oh knock it _off,_ Amethyst! We need to figure out what’s wrong with Steven!”

“Well you sure aren’t doing me any favors!” came the predictable scowl. “Maybe he’s just hungry!”

Ignoring the suggestion entirely, Pearl reached over and gingerly unbuckled the straps that held the thrashing teary-eyed infant in place. “Nonsense! I’m sure he just… needs to stretch his legs, that’s all.”

“What legs? Y’mean those fat little sausages dangling out of his onesie?” Amethyst countered sarcastically.

“Well _I’m_ confident that if I just hold him up for a moment, he’s bound to go back to sleep,” the pale Gem sniffed boldly and lifted the squirming body onto her lap.

“Heh, knock yourself out,” Amethyst scoffed and leaned against the couch to survey the scene expectantly.

Pearl kept the little bundle on her lap, unwilling to risk bringing it closer in light of all his wailing. She gently began tapping her foot against the floor, causing her knee to start bobbing up and down, to simulate the sensation of being rocked, halfheartedly humming some nonsensical tune all the while. This, of course, did nothing to help, and Pearl began to grimace as soon as she recognized this.

“I don’t understand; why won’t he settle down?!”

“Because you aren’t even _trying!_ You need to pick him up – hold him closer to your chest!” Amethyst simulated the gesture helpfully.

_“Ohhh no! No!_ I don’t think so, _not_ after what happened last time!” Pearl’s expression darkened, simultaneously prompting a blue hue in her cheeks at the unseen memory.

“Well then, why don’t we just try it my way?” Amethyst scampered over to the diaper bag and pulled out a bottle of formula – thankfully, Greg had thought ahead and prepared one in case of just such an emergency. She hopped back onto the couch and held it up with a gracious smile.

“Ugh, fine,” Pearl sat back and stopped bobbing her knee to give Amethyst better access to the little bundle.

“Alright lil man,” Amethyst cooed as she introduced the bottle to his field of vision, shaking it gently. “Here comes the airplaaaane! Woo woo!”

“Amethyst, planes don’t go _‘woo woo’,”_ Pearl stated factually, poorly mimicking her tone with a series of over-exaggerated air quotations.

“Yeah? Then how _do_ they go, madam know-it-all?” she challenged.

“… I don’t have to answer that!” the blush on Pearl’s cheeks spread further along the sides of her face. “Just feed the little creatu – I mean, just… _feed him_ already!”

“I can’t; he doesn’t want it,” Amethyst waggled the bottle again to no effect.

“That’s because you have to _give_ it to him, like so,” Pearl hastily swiped the bottle out of Amethyst’s hand, hesitating briefly before lowering it into his gaping maw. It took a few moments for the infant to register what was happening, but in a matter of seconds he happily swallowed the rubber nub and began sucking it forcefully.

“There, you see?” Pearl squared her shoulders proudly as the temper tantrum finally evaporated. “That takes care of everything! I told you he just needed to be fed.”

Amethyst shot her an incredulous glare, silently repressing another scathing remark for reasons she wasn’t quite sure she understood. The pair sat in silence for a few moments as Steven voraciously devoured the contents of the bottle, and they felt themselves both amazed that such a little potato-shaped human could be so hungry.

In a matter of minutes, once the bottle was sucked dry, Pearl gently withdrew it and set it aside. Upon seeing that the little hairball was now decidedly content, Amethyst silently wiped the imaginary sweat from her brow, looking quite relieved that things were back to normal, and Pearl smiled down at him affectionately. Everything seemed to be right and bright and beautiful with the universe once again.

That is, until he turned a brilliant shade of red once again and scrunched up his face in discomfort.

Startled, the duo gawked at him anxiously, fully expecting another tempest of tearful howls. When it didn’t come, Pearl’s heart skipped a beat – well, it would if she had one, but she was still apprehensive nonetheless. Like any overbearing but well-meaning mother would, she immediately feared the worst.

“Oh! _Oh!_ Oh no! Oh no, no no no no! _Now_ what’s wrong with him?!”

“Is he even breathing?” was the flat reply.

“Be _serious,_ Amethyst!” Pearl growled, then looked back at Steven. “What if there’s something lodged in his windpipe? Or he’s having an allergic reaction to the formula?” She then gasped loudly as the worst possible thought popped into her head. _“What if_ his feeble organic constructs just _shut down_ on him?! He could have _total. internal. failure!!!”_

“Uh, maybe you should freak out some more, that’s really gonna help us –” Amethyst’s sarcastic scoff suddenly turned into a rather loud belch; an after-effect from the sandwich she’d devoured earlier. Pearl gawked at her as if she were going to be sick.

“Heh, s’cuze me,” she offered timidly.

Pearl’s expression went from revolted to inspired in the blink of an eye. “Eureka!” she squealed excitedly. In a flash, she lifted the baby to her chest, letting his head hang over the back of her shoulder for an additional bit of gravitational assistance, and gently began rubbing circles into his back, supporting his bottom with her right arm. Sure enough, this turned out to be exactly what he needed, and Steven let out a generous wet belch to easily rival Amethyst’s.

“Nice work, P!” the young Gem gave her a quick thumbs-up. “You totally nailed this parenting thing!”

“… Amethyst, would you be so kind as to fetch me a wet rag from the kitchen. _Immediately.”_ Pearl’s tone was so quiet that Amethyst almost didn’t hear her, at first. The slender Gem was frozen in place, her eyes were as wide as saucers, and her face was turning bluer by the second. “Please,” she added as an afterthought.

“Huh? Why?”

“Because I… I _think_ the baby just got sick all over the back of my shirt,” she squeaked, feeling a ball of rising dread lodging itself in her throat.

With a scoff, Amethyst cocked her head to the side, finding it hard to suppress a disparging grin as she inspected the damage caused by the milky white ooze.

“Yeeeaaahh… it ain’t just your shirt, P.”

* * *

 

After an eternity of scooping and scrubbing and fighting back the urge to be ill (after the night she’d had, Pearl couldn’t deny it possible), the Gem duo took a generous step back from the couch to inspect their handiwork. The result left Pearl dismayed, and she drummed her fingers together with a worried hum.

“It… doesn’t look _so_ bad,” Amethyst ventured soothingly. “I’m sure once it dries, you’ll never know the difference,” she gestured to the massive wet strip that ran from the topside of the back cushion all the way down to the bottom of the boxspring. “Plus I’m sure that smell will come out! … _Eventually…”_ she added that last word under her breath, nervously running her fingers through her hair. Well, she would, if the whole thing weren’t a snarl of untamed knots and unmanageable tangles. She couldn’t count the number of times that Pearl had insisted she ought to brush it, accompanied by an actual handful of unsuccessful attempts, but she didn’t care; since the moment she’d laid eyes on Greg’s magnificent mane some odd years ago, she would never have achieved her true hair destiny.

“Thank you,” came the fretful response. “I just… I want to make sure I’ve disinfected everything _properly._ Remind me to scrub it clean again in a few hours again, won’t you?”

“Heh, what if Garnet comes back and sits in it?” Amethyst giggled behind the back of her hand.

_“Not. Funny!”_ Pearl’s tone was a bit sharper than she’d intended, but she didn’t feel the need to apologize. The actual _horror_ of their official-unofficial new leader being subjected to – oh, Pearl couldn’t even bear to imagine the consequences. She tried to banish the flurry of intrusive thoughts and clear her mind by closing her eyes and rapidly fluttering her hands over her face for a few seconds.

_“Okay,”_ Pearl proclaimed with a sharp inhale. “We don’t need to worry about the couch anymore. It’ll be alright for now. Besides, if it doesn’t come out, I suppose we can just… get a new one,” she groaned, deflated, yet still genuinely surprised that such a little human was capable of creating such an unholy mess. Despite her previous attempt to put the incident behind her, she still found herself unable to tear her gaze away from the soiled sofa. With a resigned sigh, she decided she might as well try and disinfect it one more time, since it would be the only thing that would put her mind at ease by this point.

“Amethyst, can you check on Steven for me?” she asked as she advanced toward it once again.

“Yeah, sure,” Amethyst turned on her heels and walked over to the portable carrier that had been moved to the center of the living room.

“Hmm, perhaps I could make a quick trip to the market to see if they have any cleaning solutions that might be more effective,” Pearl mused quietly as she squinted at the ingredients labeled onto the bottle of bleach she was holding. “Although I’m not sure if it would be open at this hour…”

“Pearl?”

“Hm?”

“… Don’t get upset.”

“What’s that?” Pearl briefly flicked her eyes to the side, not necessarily paying full attention to what was being said behind her back.

After a very laborious pause, Amethyst squeaked apprehensively, measuring each word carefully, as if this would somehow ease the severity of her revelation. “Steven’s… not… actually… _in…_ his car seat.”

_“WHAT?!”_

_To Be Continued…_


	3. Catharsis

Original tumblr post can be found [here](http://crystalgems-forever.tumblr.com/post/126533246789/fic-two-gems-and-a-baby).

* * *

 

If it were possible for Gems to have heart attacks, then that’s precisely what Pearl would be doing in this exact moment. Horror-struck, she turned on a dime, desperately hoping that this was just another one of Amethyst’s crude pranks. Her beautiful blue irises shrunk to the size of pinpricks when she concluded that the empty car seat before her was indeed not a joke. A cold sweat flooded the back of her physical form’s neck, her skin somehow turned several shades whiter than it was before, and she desperately clapped her hands over her mouth. By the stars, this was her worst fear realized.

“No, no, _no no no!!_ How could this happen?!” her voice trembled anxiously as she gingerly stepped toward the empty carriage. “All of the research material I read states that babies don’t start crawling until the age of seven months. He’s only six months! I don’t understand! _He has to be there!”_ her tone escalated to a birdlike screech as she clutched the sides of her head.

There was a very, very hesitant pause. _“Weeeell…”_  Amethyst’s reply died in her throat as she purposely obscured her face from Pearl.

“Amethyst…?”

“Maybe he’s just an early bloomer?”

_“Amethyst…”_

“I _maaay’ve…_ nert bklltis seebel ’perly,” she hastily mumbled the rest of the sentence as her face took on a very deep, very guilty shade of mauve.

Pursing her lips into a very thin line, Pearl pinched the bridge of her long, triangular nose and squeezed her eyes shut. “Amethyst,” she hissed through her tightly squared jaw. “Please tell me you didn’t just admit to not buckling his seatbelt properly.”

“Uhh… okay then, I won’t,” was the comedic deadpan.

Pearl inhaled deeply through her nose, attempting to reset her center of inner tranquility. It failed, as any attempts at generating thoughts beyond the urgency of the current situation was immediately swallowed by doubt. And fear. Oh, so much fear. There were not enough words to express it.

“Amethyst, you find that baby. Now. Do you hear me?”

“Huh?” The unexpectedly casual tone caught her off-guard.

“I said,” Pearl’s eyes flew open and she turned to meet her fellow Gem’s gaze with a worrying snap of her neck. “You and I are going to locate Steven right away. We’re going to put him back in his car seat, and we’re going to pretend that this night never happened, okay?” Despite the sugary sweetness of her current speaking voice, Amethyst could easily detect the stringently acidic tone she was trying not to betray.

“K,” Amethyst shrugged coolly. “So, where d’you wanna start?”

* * *

The beach house was a wreck, and so, understandably, was Pearl. After checking the every single one of the kitchen cabinets six times and literally turning the couch upside down in their search, the Gems were at a loss as to what could be done from this point onward. Amethyst had even made it a point to check in the fridge, the oven, and even in the potbelly fireplace, but to no avail.

“Really Amethyst, he won’t be in the _microwave!”_ Pearl scolded as she un-ironically inspected the inside of a particularly deep cooking pot.

“Hey, it was worth a shot!” she spat defensively as she hopped off the edge of the counter and folded her arms with a sigh.

Pearl mirrored Amethyst’s sigh with one of her own as she got to her feet, leaning anxiously against the back of the fridge. “I just don’t understand how we managed to lose – I-I mean,” she caught herself, “how he’s managed to evade us in the literal ten square feet of this beach house.”

“I gotta give the lil man props, he’s _really_ good at this whole hide-and-seek thing.”

Pearl smiled at the jest in spite of herself, then anxiously swept her eyes across the space for the thousandth time, her fingers absently gripping for a gauzy skirt to worry between her hands.

“Man, this’d be _way_ easier if we had Garnet’s future vision.”

Pearl’s face fell and her eyes grew impossibly round as she dropped the hem of her skirt. _“Don’t!”_ she gasped. “Don’t you _dare_ tell Garnet about this, Amethyst! She _can’t_ know!”

Amethyst opened her mouth to retort, but Pearl interrupted, “And you can’t tell Greg, either!”

At this, Amethyst shot her an exasperated glare. “That’s not what I was gonna –” she stopped mid-sentence, knowing that what she had to say wasn’t worth the effort.

“Well, hey, I mean… at least we know he didn’t get outside, or warp himself out there somewhere, right?” she changed up her tactic with a halfhearted attempt at a joke.

The murderous glint in Pearl’s eye let her know she’d gone too far.

With a loud, wavering sigh, Pearl pushed herself off the fridge, and laid her hands on her hips decisively. “Well, we can’t take the risk. I’m going to go outside and look for him, and if he’s not there then –”

“– Then we’re dead,” Amethyst concluded for her.

With a huff, Pearl spun around and made her way to the front door, silently praying that Steven hadn’t somehow managed to fall down the stairs – or worse. “Keep looking around the house for him. He’s _gotta_ be around here _somewhere!”_ she all but screeched, letting the flimsy screen door slam forcefully behind her.

Pearl stood out on the deck with a hand shielding her eyes, briefly allowing her physical form time to adjust to the day’s first dazzling rays of sunlight creeping ever higher into the sky. With a pang of cold dread, she realized that it had been several hours since Greg had dropped by, and concluded that it wouldn’t be long until he’d come to collect his son.

“How could I have lost track of the time?” she tilted her head back and unleashed a sad wail to vent her frustrations. If she didn’t act fast, then this whole ordeal would end up becoming a race against time that she could not afford to lose.

“It’s fine, it’s fine,” Pearl reassured herself in a falsely confident tone, simultaneously putting on her best attempt at a confident smile and rubbing her temples to ease the headache that was currently brewing. Without even thinking, she hopped onto the wooden railing, then onto one of the outer Temple’s many arms as she began to scale the cliffside.

“Of course, things _could_ always be _worse!”_ she huffed between jumps. “We’ve had missions in the past that weren’t as trying as _this_ whole mess, after all. Even though you _did_ let Rose’s most precious gift escape out in-into the wide, _wide_ world… and there’s no clue to his whereabouts… a-and… things haven’t been quite the same since…” her words hitched in her throat, unable to bring herself to say it out loud.

“We’re definitely not as _happy_ as we once were, _that’s_ for sure…” there was a deep sigh as her body came to a halt. “Rose’s spirit ascended to the stars and heavens above, and my life went straight to –!” Pearl quickly caught herself. _“Ahem._ My life went in the exact opposite direction.” She chuckled darkly at the bitter realization.

“Who knows what’ll _happen_ when Greg finds out… and… and – oh _who_ am I _kidding?!_ This whole night has been a complete _disaster!”_ Pearl finally felt herself start to break down, and she could barely contain the threat of letting the full force of her anguish escape. Her body quaked deeply with each sob that managed to escape her lips. _“Oh, I should never have agreed to watch Rose’s baby!!!”_

Something in her final sentence jarred something deep within her soul. All of the anguish, the heatbreak, her oscillating temper since that fateful day; it wasn’t about Rose – well, it wasn’t _just_ about Rose, after all – it was about Steven. It had _always_ been about Steven, long before he’d even been born. Like it or not, he was part of their little rag-tag family of outcast Gems now, and by accepting him into the Temple that night – and by extension into her life on that fateful day that he had come into the world – Pearl had irrevocably made a promise to protect and care for him, just as she did with all of those she held dear to her heart.

It took her a full minute to realize that she’d already scaled to the top of the Temple with ease and was gazing mindlessly at the shoreline, having proclaimed some of her innermost insecurities to the vanishing stars above.

“No,” Pearl shook her head stubbornly, sniffing brusquely as she brushed the tears out of her eyes. “I can’t let this get to me. Not anymore. I’m not going to let Rose – I-I mean,” she swiftly corrected herself as she took a strong, authoritative stance, raising her arms high above her head victoriously. “I’m not going to let _Steven_ down!”

A loud ping that accompanied a sudden pulse of blue light caused a deep pit to form in Pearl’s stomach. She almost lost her balance as she gasped, _“The warp pad!”_

In a flash, Pearl shot down the side of the Temple and hooked onto the gutters to nimbly swing her body through the front window, landing in a crouched, battle-ready stance. It was as though pit had shot itself into her throat when she realized who was standing there. Pearl felt the entirety of the thousands of years of her existence flash before her eyes in a matter of seconds.

Garnet slowly stepped down off the warp pad, impassive as always, despite the smoldering, charred strips that now dotted her typical black bodysuit. She then phased a fluffy white towel out of nowhere and liberally began to dry her face and arms with it, attempting to wipe away the peculiar scent of mixed sweat and hickory smoked something-or-other from her body. Pearl absently reached up to caress her own coral locks as she caught her reflection in Garnet’s visor; she looked as though she’d just been on a mission as well, between her tousled hair and her rumpled, tear-stained frock.

Realizing that she was still kneeling, she sprung to her feet with effortless pep, clasping her hands behind her back anxiously. “W-Welcome back, Garnet. How-h-how was your mission?”

Garnet titled her head with interest, as if she were gazing at some unknown entity far, far in the distance. “Fine,” she replied evenly, then turned to the kitchen.

_‘The kitchen!’_ Pearl realized with a loud mental gasp. She and Amethyst had practically torn it to pieces while looking for Steven, and she turned in its direction with a violent start.

“I can explain –!”

But there was nothing remarkable to be seen at all. The assortment of pots and pans and cleaning supplies that they’d collected for the anticipated accommodation of Steven were nowhere to be seen, presumably tucked away behind their respective cabinets. In fact, a quick visual sweep of the beach house told Pearl that everything was as neat and tidy as it had always been, before the little one had been dropped off. Garnet kept her gaze fixed on Pearl, as if concerned for her mental state, as she wrung out her towel over the sink.

“Nothing. I can explain nothing,” Pearl smiled and swallowed the lump in her throat at long last, and promptly swiveled to the side to briefly indulge in a bit of mindless terror. _‘Where on Earth is Amethyst?!’_

The dark-skinned Gem then raised her head to the space ahead of her, staring straight into the loft area that had been erected over the couch. As if in a trance, she strode over to the stairs, and began to make her way up.

“Garnet?” Pearl quipped as she noticed the taller Gem wander past. As if she were being pulled magnetically, Pearl was at her side in an instant, frantically rehearsing a series of explanations and apologies that might possibly appease Garnet’s temper if worst came to worst. Once they reached the top of the stairs, the pair was immediately greeted with the sight of Amethyst, reclining lazily against the wall, gently rocking the traveling car seat with the heel of her left foot.

Upon seeing her guests, Amethyst raised an index finger to her lips and silently shushed them, indicating that the bundle in her care required nothing less than complete silence. With a pang of sheer disbelief, Pearl leaned in as carefully as possible to examine the bundle. Sure enough, the familiar mop of curly dark locks crowning the infant’s head belonged to no other but Steven, who lay fast asleep, swathed in blankets, with a small smile plastered between his chubby little cheeks.

_“I can’t believe my flipping eyes,”_ Pearl squeaked urgently, and Amethyst was quick to shush her again, this time with a curt hiss.

“You’ll _wake_ him!” Amethyst mouthed silently.

To catch herself from fainting, Pearl reflexively seized the nearest available object – which happened to be Garnet’s right arm – and steadied herself against her fellow Gem instinctively. She’d never done such a thing before, but in the throes of experiencing a near-mental breakdown in the loft, realized she hadn’t taken the time to fully appreciate just how sturdy Garnet could be in times of crisis. It was oddly cathartic to have someone to lean on, and she decided she rather liked it.

“I see you both did well,” Garnet concluded with a nod.

“Yep. It’s like he wasn’t even here!”

Amethyst’s remark caused Pearl to dig her nails into Garnet’s skin hotly, her physical form threatening to blackout once more from the renewed shock, but the tall Gem didn’t seem to mind. She easily broke free of Pearl’s grip and descended the stairs back to the main floor, failing miserably to conceal a knowing smirk playing her lips.

Once their leader had retreated to the safety of the inner sanctums, Pearl turned to her companion with wide eyes. _“How?”_

“How what?”

“How…!” Pearl gestured to the general area around Amethyst with wide, over-exaggerated sweeps. “How… _this!_ The baby is back, the house is perfect, Garnet’s none-the-wiser –” Pearl was having a hard time trying to keep her quavering voice down in all the excitement.

_“Ssh!”_ Amethyst hissed again, and Pearl quickly clapped a hand over her mouth to try and contain herself. Sidling up to her companion, she then slid herself along the polished wooden wall to take a seat beside the purple Gem. She greatly enjoyed the sensation of cooled material at her back to help put her at ease.

The duo turned their attention back to Steven, who seemed to be experiencing a bout of fitful sleep, but it passed in an instant. With a satisfied sigh, Amethyst tilted her head back and examined the blank ceiling, but Pearl kept her gaze riveted to the bundle with extraordinary interest. She would never cease to be amazed at the odd yet wonderful quirks that humanity had to offer.

“Uhh, you don’t hafta keep doing that, you know.”

“I’m afraid that if I look away, he’ll somehow escape again.”

Amethyst then sniffed the air, her brow furrowing curiously. “Why do I smell barbecue?”

Pearl’s sheepish giggle drew a satisfied sigh from Amethyst. She was really enjoying this moment; it had been far too long since the two of them had shared a genuine laugh like this. She caught Pearl’s gaze and her smile faltered slightly, deciding to take on a more neutral expression, as though to avoid getting scolded. Although she could never bear to say it, Amethyst was beginning to suspect that Garnet had abandoned the two of them on purpose for last night’s mission, yet the thought was oddly comforting. She’d have to remember to thank Garnet for it somehow, someday, on the down-lo.

“So,” Amethyst finally murmured after an extended silence. “Greg’ll be here in a lil while. I messed up, there’s no denyin’ it.” She sighed loudly, then turned her remorseful gaze up towards Pearl. “What’re you gonna tell him?”

The slender Gem raised a finger to her chin pensively, then sprung to her feet tirelessly. “Simple,” she concluded as she offered a helping hand to Amethyst. “It’s as if he wasn’t even here.”

**FIN**


End file.
